Ask and Ye Shall Receive

A couple of weeks ago I wrote a post in hopes of finding my missing friend, Winter. Well, I just thought everyone should know that he's been found safe, though authorities suspect he was abused during his absence. My guess is that he was, because his disposition has been surly at best.

As he plummets temperatures into the single digits and throws a frigid white mantle on our homes, he's chain smoking and sneaking Old Granddad from his mother's liquor cabinet. In other words, he's kind of pissed.

This weekend we took the hellions to that chafe called "Sesame Street Live" with my sister and her family. As Mrs. P hands the parking lot attendant a $20 bill, the gentleman removes his glove. Winter immediately starts pummeling the poor man's digits with an ice mallet. As an emergency measure, the attendant puts his hand up to our sh*twagon's sputtering heater.

Mrs. P: Um.... Are your hands cold?
Parking Lot Guy: Mmnnnn.... Yeah. Everybody's paying with twenties.
Mrs. P: Oh... I'm sorry. I have a five, but I'm paying for the car behind me. Here..

Heat: Fwwwwwwwwwooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...

Parking Lot Guy: Aw... Thanks. (Wiggles his fingers... hands Mrs. P her change.)
Mrs. P: You need some more?
Parking Lot Guy: Yeah, sure...

(She cranks the dial on the heater and adjusts the vent.)

Heat: Fwwwwwwwooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...
Parking Lot Guy: Ohhhhhhhhhh.... Thanks.

Yeah. Winter's back, but a bit churlish. You might see him on Dr. Fag Phil, talking about his feelings.


Carrie said...

Oh silly! You didn't know? He decided to spend the months down here in Oklahoma. He left the other day so he must went back to see you but he told us he would be back this weekend.

Sophie T. Mishap said...

Wow. I had all the windows open today and wore my fav. wookie t-shirt.

I love these Texas winters!

sage said...

yesterday was the first day in five that we broke into the double digits! and it looks like we might go a good three weeks (maybe more) without going above freezing. Sure wish I could get down to E-ville and do some skiing.

surcie said...

I'd gladly take a little o' that. (I said a little.) It's supposed to be winter here, but I'm running the a/c. Just stopping by to say hey, Prego!